Navigating emotional turbulence: From avoidance to acceptance in the face of cancer

December 14, 2023

Cookbook for cancer, cancer awareness, cancer survivors, fighting cancer

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By Lee Kah Yee, In-House Clinical Psychologist,
National Cancer Society Malaysia (NCSM)

Upon receiving a lung cancer diagnosis, Jack (illustrated name) was overwhelmed with fear and anxiety. Once an active and health-conscious individual, he seeks refuge through binge-watching TV, steering towards a sedentary lifestyle. The mere thought of discussing his illness intensified his dread, a common response termed experiential avoidance.

Experiential avoidance, the act of avoiding or suppressing the experience of knowing the distressing emotions, often leads to a cycle of escapism and heightened distress. Jack, in denying his diagnosis today, risks leaving his cancer untreated until it inflicts great pain as it progresses.

This avoidance not only robs us of opportunities for personal growth but also detaches us from making meaningful connections to our perceived values. Experiential avoidance creates a void in our lives, distancing us from these aspects that bring meaning to life.

Jack's relentless questioning of "Why me?" confines him and hinders the potential healing opportunities. As a result, his energy spent suppressing emotions steered him away from sports, leaving him to feel empty and despairing.

Shifting from avoidance to acceptance begins with acknowledging our vulnerability to it. Jack's journey highlights the challenge, prompting a call for health strategies to minimise avoidance and promote acceptance. If you are going through a similar journey as Jack, here are the practical steps towards shifting from avoidance to acceptance.

Acceptance begins with acknowledging our emotions. Being present at the moment or being mindful allows us to understand our experiences and feelings without judgement. This substantially reduces fear and anxiety.

Acknowledging our emotions comes with creating spaces for us to express these emotions. Support groups can provide an outlet where people can verbalise their fears and doubts, further helping to alleviate the emotional burden that often accompanies a cancer diagnosis.

Finally, acceptance will flourish when we reconnect ourselves with our values. We are to identify things that bring meaning into our lives yet make active commitments towards these values for us to thrive in the face of adversity.

"When we can’t change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves." - Viktor E. Frankl. As clinical psychologists, we witnessed individuals shift from avoidance to acceptance, unveiling a reservoir of inner strength. This journey signifies the human capacity for growth and resilience, a testament to our ability to rewrite narratives and emerge stronger than before.

The National Cancer Society of Malaysia (NCSM) offers a supportive environment for those starting their journey towards acceptance. Recognizing the need for psychosocial support in cancer care, NCSM provides services for patients, survivors, and caregivers. Reach out through the toll-free helpline at 1800-88-1000 or email help@cancer.org.my. Your path to acceptance can begin with a community ready to serve.

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